It's been too long

Okay, Okay... I know I don't have many followers, but I have slacked in the blogging department. I want to say I was just too busy, but in all reality I just didn't have anything good to write about.

Since my last post I lost our sweet little baby. I went in for my first ultrasound on May 12, 2009 and found out it never even formed. My body still managed to think I was pregnant, though. I ended up having to take the pill to force the baby out of my body, I wasn't able to do it naturally on my own. I have to tell you it was the worst experience of my life. I wouldn't wish the physical or emotional pain on my worst enemy. I like to think that I grew from that experience, as did my relationship with my wonderful husband and my relationship to God.  I know he would never put me through anything that I couldn't handle. 

happy moments, praise god. difficult moments, seek god. quiet moments, worship god. painful moments, trust god. every moment, thank god!

We did end up having a pretty good Summer. One of Daniel's friends and his girlfriend from back home came to visit us here in Okinawa, Japan. We ended up seeing a lot of stuff we hadn't seen before. Exploring was fun!  I sometimes forget how lucky I am to be in such a beautiful place. Seeing their faces as they experienced things here in Okinawa really brought me back to when I first got here. I honestly cannot believe I have less than 8 months left on island.

At the end of July we got news that Daniel would be deploying to Iraq at the end of the year. I have to say I have dreaded that moment ever since I found out he was joining the military.  He's really excited about it and I'm standing behind him %110 supporting him. I'm nervous, scared, anxious... So many emotions all balled up.  I feel like being away from him for a week is like forever, I can't imagine months and months. I just know that when he gets back we'll be venturing on to a new chapter in our lives. 

We will be leaving Okinawa between June-August 2010. It's a little bittersweet. I know how much I will miss walking out my front door and smelling the ocean.. Seeing the ocean from my kitchen window. Cocoks & CoCos. So many things... But I'm ready to be back in the U.S.A!!! We are keeping our fingers crossed for Tampa, FL or Charleston, SC. I'd be ecstatic with either one!

So the most exciting news of all!!!!!! We're pregnant AGAIN!!!! We weren't really trying anymore because of the deployment but what they say is true, when you stop trying, it will happen. On August 31 I took a test and got a positive. I didn't know what to think. I was so happy that I was in tears. All I could do was just smile and smile at that line on the test... I quickly rushed to the computer to find a Due Date Calculator to estimate my due date. The result I got back was May 12, 2010. Now tell me that isn't irony. We found out on May 12, 2009 that we lost our sweet little baby and now on May 12, 2010 we were expecting another one. Have I mentioned that GOD IS GOOD! I feel that it's God's way of keeping our first one with us. We decided to keep this one a secret until we at least got an okay on an ultrasound. I honestly did not want to put my family and friends through all of that again...

So far this pregnancy has been fairly easy. Around week 6 I started getting morning sickness, or as I'd like to call it all-stinking-day-sickness. I was nauseous all day long, gagged to the point of hurling so many times, couldn't walk in my kitchen without gagging. I felt so bad for Daniel. Poor guy has had to wait on my hand and foot. 'Honey get me this, Honey get me that'. He sure is a trooper and I'm so lucky to have him in my life.  Around week 9 I started feeling some what better. I was super anxious about my upcoming u/s!

On October 6, 2009 I experienced the most amazing thing in my entire life. I got to see our sweet little jellybean & hear its heartbeat. Unfortunately, Daniel didn't get to experience this with me since he had to qualify for his deployment but we got lots of pics!  My doctor had read my chart and noticed how anxious I was. My hands were sweating and I couldn't stop fidgeting. I mentioned to her that I wanted to keep my eyes closed until she found a baby and when she did she could tell me to open my eyes.  She was so amazing, she found the baby and said, 'Whitney, meet your sweet baby'. I couldn't help but to tear up and Thank God.  She said she thought the baby was asleep because it wasn't moving very much. Once we turned the heartbeat doppler on that sure woke it up. It started wiggling around and moving its tiny little legs. Then it raised its little arm and put its hand over its face like, 'C'mon mom.. I'm trying to sleep here'. It had a strong heartbeat of 175! My doctor told me that most of the time little girls have high heartbeats.  

At this point in time I honestly can say I don't care what the sex is, as long as I get a healthy little baby.. Everyone is telling me girl, while Daniel is rooting for a boy! 

On to other things. Have you ever read something and say, "I want to be just like her/him". Someone posted a link a few weeks back to this persons blog. I started reading it and just couldn't stop. I went back and read every single one of their posts and have become so inspired. Most everyone knows me knows that I lost my sweet cousin Kadesha in 2008 to ovarian cancer.  This blog really touched home to me. As I read through the posts Sarah and her husband Brady posted as Sarah battled breast cancer, I realized I want to be just like her. She is such an inspiration to me. She was battling the most evil disease but her faith in God never suffered. Tears flowed from my eyes with each post. She was so beautiful and their love is so strong.  It just goes to show that a complete stranger can truly, truly inspire you. I think everyone should go check out the blog.  http://bandssullivan.blogspot.com/

Okay, enough for me.. I have to go find something to eat.. Ice cream sounds really good right about now :)